as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
