32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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