You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
