if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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