Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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