I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
