Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
