I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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