he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
