Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize