Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
i now understand why vodka
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
