went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize