a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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