"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Boobs speak an international language.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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