She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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