You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
You've changed since you got that strap on
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
