She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
