i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize