i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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