So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
