So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
