I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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