Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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