i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
