It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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