id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize