I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize