wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
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Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
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Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?