I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
