omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Randomize
