Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
