Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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