We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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