Buhtt sex?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize