I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
