He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Randomize
