I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
