no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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