u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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