They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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