he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
