if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
