I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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