You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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