I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize