idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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