He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
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