we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
