I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
