I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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