Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize
